Sunday, August 03, 2008

BACK IN THE DAY


A lot of my planned posts are from back in the day. For some reason, I think you might be interested in things that happened when I was growing up. Perhaps these can lead you to understand why I'm such a goofball. Heh....Anyway, if you don't care, don't read. It's no skin off my nose....

SO, I was about 6 or so. I'm not really sure, but I have a pretty clear memory of what happened. My mother was going shopping and, of course, I was with her. There was a small clothing shop - locally owned. The ladies who ran the place were very nice. Being in a small town, we all knew each other and were very friendly toward one another.
This little shop sold everything for the working woman. Hosiery, lingerie, shoes, socks, dresses, perfumes, pant suits, jewelry, make-up compacts, small make-up mirrors, the nice key purses....actually, I don't know what to call them. They looked like little pocket books that you put your keys in...you could stick one key out at a time while the others were safely snapped inside the pocket. It was THIS that is part of the memory......

My mother was busy looking through the clothing. She could have been getting something for me or for herself. Being a small store and a small town, I was allowed to wander around as long as I didn't go behind the counter or out the door.

As Mother continued to look, I nosed around, crawled under clothing racks and tried on the bracelets. As I was looking at all the sparkly accessories, I decided to try out the perfumes. I never sprayed the perfume directly onto my skin...I did what I had seen my mother do. I sprayed it in the air and walked through the cloud of vapor. Not smelling anything, I continued my trek throughout the store.

After a little bit, I started to feel really sick to my stomach, and I also started to feel clammy. I felt like I was about to puke. I went to tell Mother....who said, "Have a seat, I'll be through in a minute." I hadn't been sitting for long, when I felt the need to tell my mother that I was REALLY feeling sick.

My mother started to get frustrated with me and asked me to sit in the car. I was mad and my feelings were really hurt. I felt like she wasn't taking me seriously. (In my house, if you didn't have spots, a lot of blood, or were puking right then, it wasn't anything worth fussing over.) So I went to the car to wait.

I don't really know what all happened at that point. I remember feeling a burning in my throat. My eyes hurt. I was hot, nauseous and scared. Since I had been told to sit in the car, I had no intention of getting out...even to alert my mother of my discomfort. Instead, I started screaming. I felt like I couldn't breathe and I just hurt. It was awful. I remember leaning against the window (trying to cool down) and crying/screaming. I remember seeing my mother, in obvious distress, rush out of the store and jump into the car.

Being a young mother, and never having seen anyone carry on so (much less her own child) she rushed to the home of her mother-in-law....my grandmother. Being older and wiser, my grandmother immediately prescribed Sprite and soda crackers to calm my stomach. She got a cool cloth on the back of my neck and on my forehead. Then she, and my mother, began to question the events leading up to my problem.

I told them of the clothing racks, the bracelets, the perfume...all that I had done while my mother had shopped. My mother asked about the perfume. She and my grandmother thought that perhaps I had had an allergic reaction to the perfume. My mother called the shop to find out what kind of perfume it was.

The lady on the phone assured my mother that there wasn't any perfume out on the counter. My mother argued a bit, then came back to talk to me. She said, "Now tell me exactly where the perfume was and what you did with it." I told her that I had sprayed the perfume that was attached to the key chain.

Mother called the store again and described where the perfume was, exactly.

I cannot tell you the anger that was in my mother's voice and eyes when she found out that it was not perfume I had sprayed. The perfume was locked up. No, my friends....it was MACE!

Yep, I had maced myself.

Have you ever been maced?

It is not pretty.

I don't recommend it.

6 comments:

tollesons4him said...

Oh my goodness! It's a good thing that you didn't spray it directly on you.

Cammie said...

I once smelled the 'perfume' attached to my mother's keyring. I believe I still have no nose hairs!

R & R Stacy said...

I'm sorry but I had to stop at laugh....
Reid did that the other day at one of his off duty jobs. He accidentley sprayed himself as he was spraying someone who was fighting. HE was hurting for a few hours after that. The pain starts all over once water is invouled. It reactives it. When he got home and showered it started all over for him.....
That's terriable that you did that to yourself. You have a great memory....

Lesli said...

Good thing someone had mace because the crime in that town was out of control!

-T- <>< said...

ROFLMBO!!!!!!! It's so great to be able to read your words and actually hear your voice saying them...it makes it much funnier! Oh the good ol' days! I enjoy your stories!

Anonymous said...

Let me just say I feel your pain. When I was in school one of my friends brought a small spray bottle that he found at home, he held onto it all day long and decided at lunch in the cafeteria to let some of its contents loose on the unsuspecting diners, without telling anyone that he was doing this it came as a surprise to all in the room when everyone began sniffing and sneezing, followed by coughing and a few kids got really sick. Once it was traced back to my friend he relinquished his "Excalibur" which was a small can of pepper spray, needless to say that made a lot of unhappy sickly classmates, including myself.