Monday, October 24, 2011

I know..... I know......

Yeah, I said I would be back "in the next few days." THAT was a few days ago.... OK.... about 10 days ago.

I haven't abandoned my blog. I really haven't. I have just been busy.

I told you, I think, about my long-term subbing position. Six weeks of....

Well, six weeks of trying to hold my family together. I don't know that I was a success in either job.

The students loved me. I loved them.

My children ate and wore clean undies.

We ate a LOT more junk and the clean undies haven't been folded in weeks.


I tell ya, now that I'm home, I appreciate the fact that my hubby has a job that allows me to stay home. AND that my hubby is supportive of my staying home.

That was a journey, to be sure. It is amazing how you can be so convinced that you need to do take a specific pray, you feel led, and it doesn't work out.

It is a distressing, really, when you are so sure that letter "A" is the answer. Letters "B," "C," and "D," don't even seem to be an option. But, then you look back and you realize that letter "R," which wasn't even on your radar, ended up being the answer that God had for you.

Once you look back, though, it is truly amazing to see that God had His hand on you, AND ON THE JOURNEY, the WHOLE TIME!!! I am SO blessed. I am SO thankful. I love God, and He loves me!

So, like I said, the teaching was enjoyable. As long as I didn't think about all the house stuff NOT getting done, I was OK. The problem came as soon as I walked out of the building with 3, of my 4 boys. We would have to go get #1 from another campus. Then, we would rush home to start homework, guitar practice, piano practice, JBQ practice, supper, baths.... we had no time to play. Tuesdays, being our worst day, looked like this: Come home and start homework, leave the house at 5:15, take #3 to piano, leave to get #1 to guitar, leave to pick up #3 and drop off #2 for piano, pick up #2 from piano, leave to pick up #1 from guitar, grab, and shovel some food, drop off #2 at baseball, take #1, #3, and #4 home, put #3 and #4 in bed, leave to get #2, come home and put #1 and #2 in bed (up to one hour late.)

Yeah.... we haven't started our lunches for the next day, nor have we gotten out our clothes. No.... I did that.... often not getting in bed until after midnight. THEN, I would get up at 5 to make sure that I got myself beautified, lunches made, kids up, fed, and dressed and #1 to school by 7:30 so I could be at school at 7:45. Our *easiest* days didn't have as much running around.

My youngest has been a terror.... I think it is because of my working. My kids didn't get my attention because I was busy. We were always rushing. I realize, now, that God didn't have me receive a contract for a reason. My family cannot handle my teaching full time.

That was hard to realize, and even harder to admit out loud - especially when you consider that my husband and I were convinced that this was the best thing for us.

I was raised Pentecostal. We take the Bible as it is... we don't add to it, nor do we take away from it. We are outspoken in our beliefs. I was raised to pray specifically. What does that mean? To put it simply....if your car is broken down, and you want a red VW bug, then pray for a red, VW bug.

Back in the summer, when DH and I started talking about my return to work, I had mixed feelings. I didn't know things would fall apart, as they did, I simply enjoy my time at home. I enjoy going out and shopping for the holidays, when I want. I enjoy volunteering in school. I enjoy, being able to drop and go, as needed, or desired. Mostly, I enjoy having the day with my husband, when he is home. Returning to work would end all of that. Not some. All.

Despite the mixed feelings, DH and I discussed it and both agreed that working was the best thing for us. And, then I started.....

Yeah, it didn't take long for me to pray, specifically, and earnestly, for a job that paid more than subbing, allowed me to leave work AT WORK, allowed me to spend time with my kids, allowed me to NOT go in, on the occasion that I had a sick kid, field trip, or whatever happenstance.

Sure, I felt a bit foolish. I even told God. I told Him that, even though I knew it was within His power, I knew it was a bit *selfish* to ask something so specific and so..... well.... great! (Shout out to my friend, NR, who encouraged me to pray this way, back at kindergarten end-of-year picnic.)

The resolution to this insanity?

Well, I didn't get a contract, and frankly, took it personally. BUT, on my first day as long-term sub, I was told of several posts they had, with me in mind. (All long-term, nothing with a contract.) Yeah.... a bit discouraging.

Meanwhile, I have a friend, who has a business (with her hubby) teaching CPR and had spoken with me about the possibility of teaching CPR. I don't know when I got serious, but it was looking good. I just didn't know if that was something I should do.

About 2 weeks into my post, I started praying specifically. I had already told God about my ideas. Now the prayer was, "God... if I am supposed to teach, I need a measure of grace...and money for a housekeeper. If I'm supposed to teach CPR, I need a CLEAR directive, as I have some long-term positions opening up to me."

About 15 minutes (literally) after that new prayer, I got a text from the one friend, with the CPR business, that says, "There is a local community college that wants to pick up another section of CPR. We can't do it. We told them we had another instructor in mind. They want to start the 'new-hire' process."

Is. That. Not. AMAZING?!?!?!

So, now, I'm fast-tracking to get my CPR Instructor Certification. WAY BEYOND COOL!

That is what is going on, in a nutshell.

That, and we are 9 weeks from Christmas.


I gotta get my Turkey-Day posts up.

Stand by!

1 comment:

Kaira said...

I think it's great that you'll be able to be home more. I'm sorry things didn't work out as you expected but I'm happy for you. :)