CREEPS ME OUT!!!

Hubby and I have lived in many places. During our early years together...well, not the grade school years, but the early years of our marriage, we lived in Florida. DH was in flight school. I worked for a chiropractor.

Florida was a great place to live. We really enjoyed it. It took us 10 minutes to go from locking our front door to our toes hitting the sand of the closest beach. We spent many days on the beach, staring - in awe - at many of the creatures that God has made.

I remember once, when applying for a job, hearing a noise across the parking lot....there was a bird as tall as I am, walking along beside me.

One time, I noticed a lot of people pulled over on the side of the road, looking into an inlet. I pulled over, to be nosey, and saw manatee for the first time. They are now one of my favorite mammals.

DH and I would have lunch at a park and sit on a bench at water's edge and watch the dolphins.

We would sit on the beach and watch the pelicans dive into the water for a scoop of something yummy. We would laugh as these birds would skim across the water and misjudge the height of a wave and flip, catching their beak on the water.

I can remember being warned by the locals about being careful when walking our dogs at night. There was a large drainage ditch behind our house that crocodiles could come in. We were told that our sweet Leonard Percival and Sparky Dog could soon become snacks if we didn't keep them close.

We had moles in our yard, snakes in our grass and roaches (that were called "Palmetto Bugs") that would fly past, sounding like a C-5 in a holding pattern.

We even had a snake slither through a hole in the window screen and greet my hubby at the sink (who immediately grabbed the serpent with my kitchen shears to go outside and be disposed of......the head popped off and my coward dog peed on it.)

Truly, it was a wonder to see all the wildlife.

Until one day....one morning, to be exact....one morning when the wonder turned to terror....when the awe in "awesome" became "AWFUL"....when I had to question God....WHY? Why was this creature, this monster, this FILTH, created?

Yes, one day, I was awakened, quite abruptly, by a nightmare.

DH was at work. I was in bed, quite content in my sleep, when I felt something on my arm. I had two babies at the time: Sparky and Leonard, and I'm not ashamed to say that they slept in bed with us. I brushed the tail of one of the dogs off my arm. A few minutes later, I felt it again.

I looked up.

I couldn't even scream.

I was covered.

COVERED!!!

There were little black, winged-bugs ALL OVER the place. They were on the walls, on the window, on the floor, on my bed, on me.....I almost had to burn the whole smash.

I finally was able to pull it together and do what any self-respecting woman can do in a situation like that....I screamed.

Seeing as how the town we lived in had a mean age of 70+, my screams went unheard.

At that point, I did the only thing I could do, I got some Windex and started spraying these nasties. (Give me a break....I didn't have bug spray...what else was I supposed to use?)

It was the next day, at work, when I found out that I had been swarmed by termites.

*shudder*

That is all I can do now.